Reflections in the Wind
by CrystalxxDreams
Summary: PG cause I had a bad mouth when I was typing the authors note. If you want to read a G rated story, you can read the rest. Okay, the summary: Buffy refelcts on Spike. A Spuffy fic!


Reflections in the Wind  
  
Dedication: Kiskool, Charisma (Danni), and Frenchy (Alex)! And to all those people who inspired this.  
  
A/n: So, don't flame. Written in five minutes. Review. If you don't like it, politely tell me it sux. I don't like it myself. Whatever. Posing anyway. Oh, example of politeness:  
  
Damn, what the hell are you writing? This it the shittiest piece of writing I have ever read. Do not write anymore! For the love of god!  
  
Hehehe. No, really, don't flame just for flaming, but if it really is bad tell me. I know its kinda bad. Remember the words of Cordelia:  
  
"Tact is just not saying stuff that's true." She said something like that, anyway. Ignore all of the above, please! Truthfully, tell me what you think. PLEASE!  
  
Ship: Spuffy. And my first shot at it.  
  
Feedback: Read the A/n! Damn!  
  
It was morning and there was no sunlight in her room. She opened her eyes to the darkness. It didn't seem strange.  
  
'Was she part of the darkness,' she wondered. 'Was the darkness part of her?' She stood in front of the mirror and asked her reflection the same question in her mind. The girl she saw didn't answer. She just looked back at herself. Then she sighed and went to open the window. The sunlight blinded her sweeping the room with it's light. Now, bathed in light, she went back to the mirror. She saw a gust of wind blow the curtains behind her.  
  
'The wind…" she turned around and looked outside, 'I can't see the wind…' she thought, 'but I can see the effects of the wind.'  
  
She glanced into the mirror.  
  
'I can't see Spike." She mused, 'I can see the effects he has had on me.'  
  
The in the mirror looked worried, confused yet impassive. Like she had when she was back, yet a little colder. She peered closer.  
  
'There was something else there,' she noticed, 'a glimmer of happiness, content. Something that wasn't there before.'  
  
'He loves me,' was her next thought, 'he doesn't want to, but he dose.'  
  
She searched her face some more.  
  
"I don't want to lie to you anymore," she spoke softly, out loud.  
  
"That's all I've ever done," she said.  
  
She reflected. All her life she had lied to herself.  
  
"Angel," the name was out of her mouth before she could stop it.  
  
Angel? Did she lie about him?  
  
"No," she said, " I loved Angel."  
  
And then it hit her. What she had just said.  
  
Loved.  
  
As in past tense.  
  
"I still feel for him," she said, "but a friendship."  
  
The love was gone. The feeling was gone. She felt it, noticed it at the meeting they had together. She didn't feel excited when she saw him. She wasn't excited. She was just nervous. She remembered lying to him about Hell. How a vampire, once so good at picking up her emotions bought the story. Then Spike. How easy it had been to tell him, and how hard it had been not to lie.  
  
Riley?  
  
The name popped up at her.  
  
"There never was any feeling," she shook her head, "I liked him as a friend. I just needed an outlet. And I used him," she sighed.  
  
It was simple to put her feelings for them into words. But with Spike…  
  
It was a vortex of emotions, a mix of wild rushing sensations crashing and burning into one. Lust and passion. Trust, she admitted, yet fear. Happiness.  
  
Love, she confessed.  
  
"Love." She whispered that thought to herself.  
  
"I love Spike," the words tasted strange yet, they felt right. Smooth. A beautiful three words that wrapped up her real feelings. It was true. She knew it. She wouldn't tell him. Not yet. One day, she would. It would make him so happy, she reflected.  
  
So happy.  
  
And Buffy got dressed, again ready to face the day.  
  
As she left her room, she looked again a little different.  
  
Spike wasn't there.  
  
You couldn't see him.  
  
Yet the effects of him were in the air.  
  
And all over Buffy. 


End file.
